Disco Pimples: My 6 Step Chinatown Facial

cartoon-facial-masqueAsia is always such a beauty Mecca. With funky make-up schools & great skin-care concessions, Singapore is a fun city to experiment with the latest trends. Which is why I find myself having the best/worst/most sensory-fueled hour of my life in a Chinatown salon this evening. What is they say; ‘no pain no gain….’

Step 1: I meet my nice beautician Sherry, and we start like any other normal facial. Apply. Remove. Apply. Remove. Lots of potions and lotions.  One smells quite like the nice mango salad I had for lunch. So far so good.

Step 2: Sherry places an eye lotion mask on me. “Sleeping” she whispers. I’d love to, except I can hear the intriguing noise of beeping machinery? This is followed by the sudden gush of warm steam 12 inches from my head to “open my pores. ” It’s quite an odd sensation, but cozy and soothing. Regular air feels a little chilly to be honest, when after 10 mins she takes it away.

Step 3: Extraction. Which apparently is a nice word for attacking my face with the world’ tiniest miniature tweezers. It’s possibly THE most painful 7 mins of my entire life, and that includes all kinds of girly waxing.  Sherry tries to make me feel better by showing me the filth she’s prized from my face, but I can’t see for the tears streaming from my eyes. Big baby.

Step 4: Is a layer of ice-cold gel cream. I see what their game is; a little love, a little pain. Thinking that this is a mask, and I get to do more “sleeping” time, I relax. Until I hear the unnerving vibration of electric current, oozing out of a fluorescent purple glow stick?! “Disco pimples” Sherry giggles. It’s not as torturous as it sounds, but I could definately feel the heat of a laser through my gel conductor mask. I can only guess that it was some kind of UV device for skin toning? I should really check these things before one day I accidentally end up with cosmetic surgery.

Step 5: From the Pimple Disco to the bandaged mummy look. I’m bandaged over with soft gauze and then have heavy clay poured onto me like a Madam Tussauds mask. After stages 3 & 4 it’s all quite pleasant. It’s just that Sherry is quieter than a mouse, so with my eyes bandages shut it’s making me jump every time she sneaks in & reaches to see if it’s set yet.

Step 6: After a few nice spritz’s and serums I’m done! The whole treatment lasted maybe 45 mins, and I’m presented with a little cup of cleansing Ginseng to sip as a parting gift.

I leave feeling slight bemused but definitely refreshed. For around $38 budget it was defiantly worth it in the name of experimentation. For everything else there’s Groupon!

Nardia Face & Body Care, is on the doorstep of Chinatown MRT – 72A Pagoda Street, level #2. Open Mon – Sun 10.30am – 8.30pm, Prices start from $30 facials – $88. Outlets throughout the city.

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An.an.tas.in : The Anantasin is the name of a shipwreck just of the coast of the Sensi Parasise, Mae Haad Bay, Koh Tao, Thailand. It’s one of my many favorite places.

Lit.tle: Just because it’s cute.

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